Space Moose Annotations
The following comments were written by Adam Somebodyorother, the author of Spacemoose. In some cases I have edited them to remove his real name, as per his wishes (that's right, Somebodyorother is not his real surname).
The dates given indicate when the comment was written, not when the strip was penned.
- Bald Dwarf's question
The depiction of Space Moose's father in this strip is clearly human. However, in How to blaspheme, Space Moose's parents are both depicted as quite cervoid. The inconsistency is hard to justify, especially considering that the two strips were created less than a year apart. The story to which I would like to stick is that Space Moose was born of cervoids back on Olmak, as explained by Space Moose: the origin, and when he arrived on Earth, he was adopted by the man depicted in this week's feature strip: Alan Moose.
Barnacles are crustaceans, not mollusks.
[February 5, 1998]
- I'd do just about anything for a million dollars
The straight man here is a grotesque caricature of Paul Hansen, an old schoolmate with whom I worked one summer. The dialogue is a distilled version of a typical conversation between myself and Paul, who was usually a very jovial fellow but sometimes prone to downright crankiness. The close-up of Space Moose in frame 2, with his frumpy mane, is a perennial favorite.
[October 29, 1996]
- Jumbo Antlers
It used to be (and still is, to some degree) that Bald Dwarf was the poster boy for everything that sucked. In this strip, he is seen wearing one of those insipid 8-ball jackets that were so hip years ago, and a baseball cap bearing the then-trendy slogan "BAD" on it. Bald Dwarf has matured a lot since then - his banality somewhat overshadowed now by Marlo Smefner - but still has about as much charisma as hyrax turd. [October 11, 1995]
- Space Moose goes to C.A.P.S.
This is a strip from the old days when Space Moose spent most of his time experiencing campus life. C.A.P.S. (Career and Placement Services) is an office at the U of A designed to help students find jobs.
Oftentimes, I will draw a strip right up to the last frame, then get stuck on the punchline. I will spend an inordinate amount of time struggling to come up with the best ending. When a deadline is nipping at my buttocks, I often make a hasty decision which spoils the strip. This
is definitely one of those cases.
Space Moose was pointing at the executive producer posting in frame 5 (this was shortly after the death of Gene Roddenberry), and a much better frame 6 would have had Space Moose socking it to Majel Barrett.
[April 9, 1997]
- Where's Space Moose?
One of the early warning signs to spot a suicidal individual is the presence of pervasive death themes in his drawings. If this strip doesn't make me a candidate, then I don't know what will. But don't worry, I wasn't feeling the least bit suicidal when I penned this spoof of the popular Where's Waldo? books back in '92. A number of people came up to me shortly after it ran, and said, "I give up. I spent 2 hours looking for Space Moose and I can't find him. Where the fuck is he?" Good question. [September 11, 1995]
- Someone is calling me
I have a friend who absolutely hates this strip. This is probably due to his well-justified antipathy towards Dungeons & Dragons and everything that resembles that lame fantasy genre. Personally, I don't think it was that lame a strip. It was quite different from what people had come to expect from Space Moose. [February 5, 1996]
- Welcome to Sodom
I had to explain this strip to more than a few people after it ran in the Gateway. I think the premise should be fairly obvious to anyone familiar with the fable of Sodom from the book of Genesis (I think). Basically, this is Space Moose's interpretation of why God took it upon himself to destroy Sodom. [November 10, 1995]
- Just cream for me
This strip sucks. The two bible thumpers are holding a copy of Watchtower, a Jehovah's Witness periodical, and Jehovah's Witnesses don't drink coffee. Of course, I didn't know this at the time. Due to the mean-spirited and anti-religious nature of the strip, I expected some angry letters. Alas, there were none. [February 22, 1996]
Addendum: I have just been informed that Jehovah's Witnesses CAN drink coffee. Sorry about the error, and thanks to Scott Krakiwsky from the U of Alberta for bringing this to my attention. [February 26, 1996]
- A year in review
I try to be as accurate as possible when dealing with Star Trek in my strip, but my haphazard research often leaves many questions unanswered. For example, was Wil Wheaton even in the cast during the fourth season? (Please do not e-mail me if you know the answer.) Tentaclon is a monster some friends and I constructed by cutting up an old Next Generation calendar and sticking mismatched body parts together. Talosians, incidentally, are those bum-headed telepath aliens from the famous Managerie episode of the original series. Check out the very evil-looking head-on drawing of Billy in frame 2.
[September 18, 1997]
- An Introduction
Here is an example of what happens when I remember that my cartoon deadline is in fifteen minutes. Rather, it is what used to happen in the days when I actually cared about deadlines. Lots of text and little artwork typically indicates shabby effort. This is basically the only stream of consciousness Space Moose strip. The rest of them were at least somewhat premeditated.
[June 29, 1998]
- Saved by the fat fuck
"What a stir this is gonna create," I thought to myself as I quietly slipped the original into the cartoon submissions stack. The editors must have had some reservations about printing it, anticipating the complaints they would inevitably receive. It was easily the most offensive Space Moose to date, and it nipped at the fringes of their sacred anti-sexist policy. Nevertheless, they printed it, and I was disappointed by the limited response. Several weeks later, I felt vindicated when the strip appeared briefly on the 6 o'clock news as an example of offensive cartoons typical of The Gateway.
[September 24, 1996]
- The Adventures of Stupid Man and Retard Boy
Appearing in this otherwise unnoteworthy strip is Retard Boy, a peculiar character who has made a few other cameos in Space Moose (Saved by the fat fuck, The Trial, and 2-to-1 odds on PKU). Although his appearances are modest and rare, humble Retard Boy managed to capture the hearts of 13 voters in the 1996 reader poll making him the fifth most popular character. Originally named "Bee Bobby," Retard Boy was developed in the margins of my high school notes - the same place where Space Moose (then "Mental Moose") was born.
[January 7, 1997]
- Space Moose 90210
This strip was a big hit when it appeared in the Gateway in early 1992. At the time, I was only a casual watcher of 90210. I tuned in occasionally to masturbate, but rarely watched entire episodes. That's why I did not know how to spell Dylan's name correctly. Now, of course, I never miss the show. Did anyone catch the season finale last night? Holy fuck, eh? I knew Brandon and Valery were gonna go at it. And what about Ray? I couldn't believe what an asshole he was. There's going to be hell to pay when David finds out. [May 25, 1995]
- Peer counselling
For the most part, Space Moose is an apathetic nihilist who does not care about nor believe in anything. He seeks only to gratify himself and he has no hangups about how to do so. However, once in a while an idea will penetrate his indifference and transform him from an impassive sloth into a frothing zealot. He still has no underlying morality to guide him in pursuit of his goal, he has only the objective.
This week's feature strip illustrates Space Moose's fanatical personality quite well. When he became a peer counsellor (a nice opportunity to prey on the emotionally wounded), someone probably told him that the first thing he must do is identify the counsellee's problem. The next thing to do is attack the problem. So focused on these objectives, Space Moose becomes blind to all else. Some other good examples are seen in The faster, the safer, Simon says and Take back the night.
[July 8, 1998]
- I can sense what you feel
This is a pretty good example of what happens when Space and Billy play. It begins with innocent niceties followed by innudendo which quickly builds to a profane crescendo. Finally, someone is driven from the room by the ugre to masturbate.
In the final frame, Space Moose was originally holding the Troi doll in his left hand. Moments before submission, I decided that the doll was too mistakable for an erection, and whited it out. I probably should have left it ambiguous.
[December 4, 1996]
- Space Moose meets Tooker Gomberg
Tooker Gomberg is a local tree-boffer who rode the wave of enviro-mania all the way to a seat on city council. I still remember the first encounter I ever had with Mr. Gomberg. It was several years ago, long before Tooker became an alderman, that a few friends and I went to check out a shitty little dive called "The Grove". We arrived at a dilapidated building to find a piece of loose leaf tacked to the door declaring that The Grove had been shut down indefinitely (due to health reasons, I inferred). However, the band which was scheduled to play the Grove would instead be playing next door, at a place humbly named "Ecocity".
Ecocity was only slightly less decrepit than The Grove. From the outside, it looked like a typical skid row building which had narrowly escaped condemnation. No smoking was allowed inside, so the environmentalists were forced to enjoy their cigarettes outside the front door. The same people who picket factories and organize sit-ins for cleaner air were standing there filling their lungs with crisp clean tobacco smoke.
Ecocity's interior looked like Buffalo Bill's basement in "The Silence of the Lambs". Numerous blankets were tacked to the ceiling to conceal water stains. Unfortunately, they had been left up there for so long that they had collected water stains themselves. I guess no one would machine wash them because phosphates destroy the ozone, and it was too much work to hand wash them. The furniture looked like it all came from the dump. Pieces of unmatching carpet were strewn about the floor. An uncarpetted region at one end of the room served as a makeshift stage.
My friends and I found a relatively clean spot on the floor and sat down. After a guy finished pumping out "Amazing Grace" on a set of bagpipes, a small hairy freakish man took the stage. This was Tooker Gomberg. With eyes wide, he began a speech which was singularly the most obtuse thing I have ever heard.
"Imagine a world without oil," it began. "Think about how much we rely on oil, and how much we use every day. It really is amazing." Tooker followed this insipid path of thought for a few minutes. Then, he started talking about Cuba. Due to a national oil crisis, Cuba had resorted to buying 250,000 bicycles, which would be distributed throughout the country for public use. Tooker was simply in love with this concept. "Some of us are going to Cuba next month just to see how they're doing things." I wondered how he planned to get there. Airplanes use a lot of oil, so that was out. A car or bus? Nope. They use oil too. Maybe he was going to ride his bike to Cuba. Oh shit! Bikes need oil too! Oh well. Maybe he walked to Cuba.
Anyway, this guy is now a city councilman. Fortunately, it looks like his chances of getting re-elected are slim at best. [June 12, 1995]
- Condomania
In the spirit of these unenlightened times, I feature the one and only Space Moose strip that The Gateway ever refused to print. It was censored three years ago on account that it was "not funny." Now, I will be the first to admit that this strip is not among my best work, but since when has The Gateway refused to print stuff that fails to amuse the editor? The Gateway has printed many lamer Space Moose strips before and since. [March 11, 1996]
- Demented chess game
If I had to pick one strip as the definitive Space Moose cartoon, this would be it. I was greatly disappointed at its mediocre performance in the reader poll. No other strip so concisely portrays Space's irreverence for the sensibilities of others, nor his shrewd ability to put on a face (see frame 2). The woman is nobody in particular. Also of note is the rare Next Generation uniform.
[October 22, 1996]
- How to blaspheme
I had some pretty strange ideas for strips in the early years. In this one, Space Moose takes a silent journey through Exodus to deliver a pictographic review of God's ten commandments. If you ever forget how to be moral and do not have a copy of the Bible handy, please feel free to use this strip as your catchall morality guide. (Just try to remember that Space Moose demonstrates the Don'ts, not the Dos.)
Most of the commandments were easy to depict, however some really stumped me. "Thou shalt not bear false witness" was the most difficult. I could have done it much better by showing Space Moose crossing his fingers behind his back. "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors [stuff]" was a tough one too, so I just showed Space peering longingly over the fence at a donkey (ass) that presumably belonged to a neighbor. I messed up "remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy," by representing the sabbath day as Sunday. As Karl Mueller explained, Friday is the sabbath day in the Jewish religion where the ten commandments originated; the Christians screwed it up. Way to go.
[November 5, 1998]
- The Poetry of Space Moose
When I'm close to the deadline or too busy to spend any time on the cartoon, I often submit text-heavy strips like this. It may not look like it, but a typical Space Moose strip takes about two hours to make. What can I say? I can't draw.
Incidentally, the University of Alberta uses a very stupid 9-point grading scale (no one knows why). A 2 is a very very poor mark.
Observant readers will note that the second poem is an acrostic.
[May 30, 1995]
